O n e L o o k /3 W a y s

2005 Parenting/Family Goals
Reflecting On the Past For a Better Future

Often, many of us are so busy thinking and planning for the future, that we rarely pause to evaluate or reflect on where we have been. The New Year is a great time to do this type of reflecting. An important place to reflect is in regard to our family behaviors. Make the New Year an opportunity to review the past year's family dynamics, expectations and outcomes. You can focus on ways to adjust or improve and then set a goal of implementing these changes for next year.

Family Routine

Every family has its own unique routine. Family routines can range from the time of day we must get up, to the type of daily activities we engage in, to the evening and bedtime activities. Children need routines, but they need a routine that is beneficial to their health and well being.

Did your children get enough sleep last year? According to the National Sleep Foundation, the following daily sleep guidelines apply for the various age groups

1. Newborns: 10.5-18 hours
2. Infants: 14-15 hours + a nap
3. Toddlers: 12-14 hours + a nap
4. Preschoolers: 11-13 hours
5. School ages (5-2 years): 10-11 hours
6. Teens: 8.5 to 9.25 hours

Did your daily routine set aside a special time for communicating with your children? This can include helping with homework, talking about each other's day, playing a game together, or simply fixing dinner together. It is hard but we should try to do our best to limit the time our children watch TV or play on the computer. At first your children will not like this idea at all. But, the New Year is a great time to discuss this with them. You can explain that we all want the New Year to be better and their spending more time with the family is better for everyone.

Did you reinforce good daily grooming habits? Children should learn at an early age to brush their teeth at least twice a day, take daily baths, brush their hair in the morning, and wear clean clothes each day. This is particularly difficult to get across to boys. I am still having trouble getting my 13 year old son to remember to brush his teeth every morning. Remember to teach children to wash their hands after they have been playing outside or have been in public places where germs can be spread easily.

Did you include reading in your daily activities? Whether you read aloud to your child, listen to your child read to you, or spend time reading silently together, make sure reading is included in your routine every day. Reading is such an important skill. Their ability to read well affects everything they will do for the rest of their lives, including being able to do well in school.

Healthy Eating

We are all busy, whether we work outside the home or in it. Eating on the run has become an unavoidable habit for many of us. It would probably shock you if you took a few minutes to consider the types of food your child eats regularly. Did your child eat breakfast each day? Maybe the most difficult yet most important thing is to make sure your child starts his/her day with a healthy breakfast. Breakfast helps to fuel a child's energy and learning power for the entire day.

Did you monitor what your child ate even when you ate outside the home? If your child takes a lunch from home, make sure to include healthy choices such as fruit and low-fat entrees. If you and your family eat out, take control of what choices they make. Don’t forget to set a good example yourself.

Did you limit the amount of sugar your child ate? Childhood obesity is a major problem today. Too much sugar is at the heart of many health-related problems. Try to stock healthy types of snack foods and cold drinks at home so your children won't be tempted to eat cookies and candy and drink sugar-filled sodas. Make sure lots of fruit is available and easily accessible. Always encourage your children to drink more water. Pay attention to the fat and sugar content on products that you buy at the store. Unfortunately, convenience foods and snacks are the most unhealthy.

Did you ensure that your child got exercise every day? Children today have become quite inactive by watching more TV and playing computer games. Children need exercise - it stimulates learning and is a wonderful help in terms of weight management. If your child is not involved in a sporting activity try to find other types of exercise to engage in. You can take family bike trips before dinner, walk the dog each day, take your child to a park where they can play on a jungle gym or even swim during warm days. Children will benefit from the fresh air, sunshine and of course, the opportunity to just have some fun.

Emotional Health

Do you let your child know every day that you love them? All children need to feel loved by their parents or caregivers every single day without exception especially when they have had a “bad” day. This can be done in many different ways. Simply say "I love you" when you drop them off at school, put a friendly note in their lunch –box, or if possible, drop by to have lunch with your child one day during the week. If you have to discipline your child for something, make sure they understand that the discipline does not impact the fact that you love them.

Pay attention to your child's emotional needs. Watch for any signs of sadness or trauma. Talk to your child's teachers and caregivers if they have them, to make sure they believe your child is emotionally healthy. In the event of any abnormal behaviors, address them immediately with a healthcare professional. A good pediatrician can help in emotional matters.

With some truly honest reflection about the past year and the willingness to make changes, we can all make the coming year a better one for our families.

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Sabrina Gould

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